Now I know the answer..

When we used to go up and visit my parents with my oldest (who was just a baby at the time), I wondered when we left..why is my mother crying? My dad died while I was pregnant for my second daughter so they never got to meet unfortunately.. We would go up for a weekend with both little ones, my mother always cried when we left. My mom would take the girls for 1 week each summer (as much as she could handle with 2 little ones) .. we would come pick them up.... she cried when we left. I would go up and bring my mom down to our house for a week (or however long she wanted to stay) - then drive her back home when she was ready - she cried when we left.

My grandson lives 2 hours away now.. I cry when he leaves..

Now I understand...

Not so many tater tots anymore...

This was supposed to get easier once they moved away.. it sucks. Had the little guy for 4 days over Labor Day and it was awesome! I'll never NOT say that he doesn't wear me out, but it's a good feeling of being worn out. We talk on the phone a lot and he always tells me that he misses me and loves me ... I send him a weekly *package* (he loves getting mail).. This weeks package was the pair of crocs that he left here and a couple of videos I had for him. Nothing big.. but getting mail is COOL! lol :) Makes him happy and makes me happy knowing that he is happy.

He started Kindergarten... full day. His mom drops him off in the morning at 7am.. before school daycare.. and then he takes the bus home. The freakin' bus! He's little to take the bus, but he told me all about it... and about what a big boy he is now.. and how the bus driver drops him off at the right spot everyday... where his mom is waiting for him... :) And he's having fun in school.. I asked what he does in school.. He replied "oh you know, learn more numbers and letters and reading - just stuff like that".. :)

I got a 2 phone video's from his mom last week... He was cruising on his Razor (I bought him for his birthday) - balancing perfectly and going fast!!! AND - starting riding his bike without training wheels! She didn't finish the video as he went helmet and torso into a tree (LOL) and came out saying.. "it happens" and starting riding again. I'm so glad he knows that he needs the helmet!!! :)

Today I got mobile pics of them at the bird place (audobon society) in Portland.. looking for milkweed .. Not sure what they are doing with the milkweed, but I remember when my girls were little, they made Xmas decorations with milkweed... Guess we'll find out soon enough :)

Soooo.. I guess this tells you how I am.. and how things are.. I have more.. Maybe tomorrow :)

Oh what a feeling!!!!

My daughter and grandson came down Tuesday!!! I came in the house and the little guy just about knocked me over! I got the biggest hug and a sincere "I miss you so much Grammy!" .. Brought tears to my eyes (and it's doing it again just writing about it!) ..

Daughter went out with friends to the Casino Ballroom at Hampton Beach Tuesday night, so we had the boy to ourselves! He was sooooo excited! (as were we!) Went in the pool and played with the remote control boats. Ordered pizza .. just had a blast! Unfortunately I had to work the next morning, but my daughter decided to stay another night (last night)... wooohooooooooooo!!! I was thrilled! We had a nice dinner and then did the pool thing all over again - the little guy and I crashed around 9 (watching TV in the BIG bed)..

They did have to leave today, but came by my office to say cya.. I wasn't in my office when they got there, but when I walked in, he hollered "Grammy!" and jumped in my arms and just hugged me sooooo tight! My daughter and I chatted for a bit and off they went (but will be back in a couple weeks.. can't wait! :)

When they walked out to her car I was holding the door and he turned around and came back.. and hugged me, gave me a big smooch and said he missed me already ... what a feeling ..

Getting the "Hotel" back in order..

I finally have my office again... got everything moved in here yesterday and Comcast came today (yes Sunday) to get the broadband up and running again in here. Not sure why the other guy made it inactive when the new connection was put in the kitchen back when, and don't really care as this didn't cost me anything... whew (he was here for over an hour)..

My kitchen is becoming a kitchen again. Got the new table in there yesterday and this afternoon we have a roman shade to hang (should be fun considering the BF doesn't know jack about doing anything in the house... like hanging a 71" wide roman shade! lol). The living room set was delivered last week so that room is all set. The oldest daughter finished cleaning out what was her sisters "nest" (what a mess!!!) ... boxed up what was left, shampooed the carpet and painted the walls and made herself a nice little living room up there. Will make a decent guest room for anyone that wanders in and needs a place to stay for a night or two (on a futon).

The grocery bill is WAY down.. from $200+ per week to about $85-$110. Anxious to see the light bill and the water bill.

BUT.. I haven't seen my grandson since they left... and I miss him sooooo much! I worry about him (no need to, he has a great mom) .. can't help it. He calls me almost everyday though.. sometimes he just rambles on and on and other times it's a quick I love you.. She's got him registered to start school (kindergarten) ... I'm sad that I won't see him go to school on his first day.. But that's moms job, right??

The "cement pond" (as I call it) has finally started to warm up. What a miserable summer we're having... rain rain and more rain. We have a few hot, humid days (which helps warm the pool), then it rains again (and again and again) - causing algae in the pool. We probably shouldn't even have opened it this year, but with such a short summer season up here, one can only hope for the best I guess. Hopefully August and September will be nice so it gets some use.. but here it is, August 2nd - and its raining! Cabin fever in winter from all the snow and now again, from all the rain... Depressing to say the least!

Oh.. my grandson got his case of brown beans!! His first comment to his mom was... who sends beans?? LOL Then his mom read the card that came with them and he called me immediately, laughing and thanking me and telling me that's what he was having for dinner.. :)

Still too damn quiet..... :(

Empty Nest

Well they're gone.. youngest daughter and grandson that is. Moved on Thursday - about 2 hours away from here (Maine). I've talked to them most everyday since then (2 days now! lol) and they are settling in nicely. I don't think it's hit me that I'm not going to see that little guy everyday anymore yet - it's like they're just away for the weekend. Even though all the their furniture (and our furniture) is gone, there are still the many backyard toys that they can't bring with them (as they are in an apartment complex - which makes me happy) so I see his basketball hoop in the backyard and his sand table, Tonka trucks, bumper pool boat, etc.

It's horribly quiet here..

My grandson always loves seeing the UPS or Fedex guy come as that means a package that MIGHT be for him, might not - doesn't matter - he thinks it's cool that his Grammy just goes on the computer and then things come here. So, since he LOVES Bush's brown beans so much (one of his favorite foods - brown beans! lol) - I ordered a case of the microwavable bowls of Bush Beans and they are addressed to him. I enclosed a gift card.. lol He'll be happy he got a package just for him and he'll love what's in the box!! :) If I could send tater tots, I would - but can't due to the fact that they are frozen (obviously another favorite of his). I'll just bring him a big bag when I go visit him :)

I think once we get our house back in order I'll be good with all this. It's time for my daughter and her BF and her son to move on - start their new life.... and we need to get ours back.

It's just too damn quiet right now.... :(

Grandson and Daughter leave tomorrow..

They are going up to Maine to stay with an aunt, and she (daughter) has 3 weeks there to find an apartment, daycare for the little man, and get him registered for kindergarten .... AND, she DID find a job (for now). So that's a start.. She finished college (again) - massage therapist (plus has the teaching thing under her belt) -- She'll be fine..

It's going to be a tough day tomorrow as things are actually starting to happen. I'll say my goodbyes tonight - go to work at my normal time (6am) as I don't want to be here when they leave.. This is the first step - the final step will be when the moving truck is here for all their things.. That will be the toughest day.. Not looking forward to it, but it's time for all to get their own space, their schedules, routines.. their lives where they should be. That includes me and the BF..

We had the little guys birthday party yesterday.. It's been raining here every day since April I believe.. Yesterday, was the most perfect day we've had all spring/summer. Not a drop of rain.. all his friends showed up - there had to have been 40-45 people here. Everyone swam in the pool (even though the water is a mere 70 degrees.. brrrr), we had chicken and hot dogs and burgers and corn on the cob and mac salad and potato salad and a bunch of other "odds & ends", the kids (and adults) played games in and out of the water.. it was simply a perfect day! He'll be 5 on July 10, but we wanted to have his party while they were still here so he could have his friends from preschool here, etc. Again -a PERFECT DAY for all!

Need to get back to making dinner...

Wow...the day/night care is amost over..

I love my kids.. I love my grandson. Been taking care of the "kids" and grandson for a few years... and been taking care of my grandson, 4 nights a week, for the past ... 15 months or so, so his mom could take her massage therapy class at night.

You will see a lot of "I" 's here - because yes, I'm talking about me!! It's all about me for once.

I go to bed early as I get up early (4am - the latest) ... so taking care of the little one made me stay up late! Way tooooo late! 10-11pm - which left me with only 4-5 hours sleep. GRUMP.. I can't sleep until I know his mother is home. Don't ask why, I can't answer the question. When my oldest daughter is home, I can sleep because I know she's here and he will be ok. And I KNOW that I could have put him in his bed, and all would be fine.. Problem is -- I couldn't put him in his bed... so we hung out in the BIG BED and watched a little Nick on TV and he would fall asleep around 9.. But even though sleeping, I couldn't put him the bed.. A fear of ?????

We did spend our evenings trying to keep the boy entertained - although I think he entertained us more..

So anyway.. 3 more days .. Mon / Tues / Weds ... His mom is done college and DAY/NIGHTCARE IS CLOSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It was a LONG 14 months (I know it was more than 14 months) - but we did it... Perhaps there is a God! :) We all survived - :)

Damn.. we DID IT!

Mothers Day Weekend

Happy Mothers Day to all you mothers out there!

I took Friday off (vacation day) as I needed a break. My boss is totally out of hand with his demands -- doesn't seem to know there is only 24 hours in a day but wants wants and wants more. I've been at this company for 15 years and was hoping to retire here (even though we have no pensions or anything nice like that) - but at this point I don't know how much longer I can stand working for this man (sigh). Unfortunately there are no jobs to be had so I have no choice as much as I want to tell him where he can stick his iron scepter. I'll end up working Sunday for a while to get a few things caught up as I will be "punished" for taking a vacation day.. (more work... stupid work that he'll never read or utilize in any way whatsoever.. but just to make me fall further behind). Me and the other girl that work for him know how it goes and try to cover each other, but we can only do so much. He is the VP of sales and marketing and also has 12 sales people that he just loads and loads with "paperwork" yet wants them out on the street for 10 hours a day.. grrrrrrrrrrrr But enough about the ass.

ANYWAY... It's mothers day weekend. My youngest and her BF and my grandson have gone to her fathers camp for the weekend (to give me a break) and my oldest is working at the hospital - today and tomorrow - 12 hour shifts. The BF is working as usual, so I have had a couple days to myself which is worth more than a million dollars to me.. Well, not really, but you get the drift. I've needed this "silence" .. as much as I miss everyone, especially the grandson.

Tomorrow (mothers day) - my kids won't be here, but I told my BF that after he visits his mom, I want him to go to The Meat House (the most awesome butcher shop around.. they have a few locations in NH/ME - even have a website www.themeathouse.com) - and I want a damn nice steak for dinner tomorrow night. Maybe a 2 inch porterhouse..mmmmmmmm (I'm drooling!) lol

We're having our deck redone. Had it built only like 4 years ago, but it's pressure treated wood, it needs sanding and staining every year and it's SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO hot to walk on in summer (as it's in direct sun all day long). So after much thought and research, pricings, etc.. We're going with Latitudes decking.. Trex stains, Azek stains but Latitudes claims not to so that's what we're going with. The prices for all composite decking have been very comparable, however, presentation was a key for us. The latitudes guy brought pictures, samples, ideas, and was able to quote immediately (and it seems to be the better decking after researching it). One guy (Azek) wouldn't even give me his business card.. he said "I'll give you a bunch when the job's done"... You know what I said right??? lol And 2 other guys take up to 2weeks to get back to us with a price (Trex). So re-decking is our big project for this year.

That's about it... Got to take the dog out (my oldest daughters...another story for another day).. (deep breath) :)

Calico found!!

Found Nala! The *F* was taking out the trash last night and heard a cat crying.. (keep in mind, Nala, the cat that was MIA - has never been able to "meow" - just squeaked) .. but this cat was MEOWING!!!. He went next door to see whose cat was stuck in there and found Nala in their garage! She apparently went in when the neighbor had the door open to take out his Harley or his Baracuda or whatever toy it was, and she ended up trapped in there. She's home safe and sound - albeit quite hungry!!! and can now MEOW!! LOL

Why..

can't things go MY way?? Weekend off from the "kids" ... and I get sick.. WTF???
Sometimes I would just like to take a gun to my head sometimes ... can't get a break. ha ha

Lost 2 cats however.. My "thief" - the one that stole fishing gear from the neighbors disappeared about 2 weeks ago. He was soooooooooooo old. I'm guessing he was 20 if not more - wasn't taking care of himself, etc.. think he just "took the walk". Noticed yesterday that one of the cats, a pretty calico, hasn't been around.. I believe someone lured her in their house with something as she wasn't real friendly with strangers.. Haven't seen her today either :(

Did manage to get a couple new bird/squirrel feeders up (I like them to share).. Got the front and back lawn mowed today and next weekend we'll take the cover off the pool and start preparing it for summer.

I'm tired.. sore throat, headache, etc.. I'm off to lay on the couch and watch a movie and relax before the kids get back home....

Finally some SUNSHINE coming!!!

When they say April showers bring May flowers.. they certainly meant it about the showers!!! Lots and lots of rain so far this month - I belive it has rained almost everyday, and if no real rain, drizzle and gloomy, cloudy, dark, BLAH.. not much sun at all.. Everyone has cabin fever from the long winter and the rain isn't helping "spirits" rise much!

Well this week the weather people have said a sunny, WARM weekend is coming! Stating almost 90 degrees on Sunday!!! I can't wait to get out there and just suck up some sunshine, open all the doors and windows in the house to "change the air" (finally).. and RELAX in the heat of the sun.

I just hope the weather peeps are right!

My new vehicle

After weeks of searching, comparing, wheeling and dealing (which let me tell you.. NO ONE wants to sell a vehicle.. I swear! - so there was no wheeling and dealing to be had) - I finally got a vehicle. I was looking to lease, as I always do and no one is leasing.. Except a little from Chysler and BMW - to the "elite" I was told. Guess I'm not "elite" enough. Guess a credit score of 740 isn't good enough...

I was looking for another SUV and they are expensive... very expensive to buy ($450+ for payments for 84 .. EIGHTY-FOUR months! 7 years!! - to keep the payment down! lol). Hell with that... I had dealers searching (so they said) ... told them what I was looking for, how much I wanted to pay, that I seriously wanted to lease again (but understood), etc. Figured if someone really wants to sell a vehicle, they'll work hard at it and sell a vehicle to me - on my terms.

Well Ford finally called me back (after I ignored a few calls from them even - kinda showed me, ok... they want sell me that SUV). Turned out that they started leasing again.. Got me in the 2009 Ford Escape (that I wanted - with ALL the bells and whistles) and at the lease term and price I wanted to pay!

So everyone is happy!!! Especially me :)

Plans for Easter...

I guess I should explain one thing first - I was brought up Catholic.. Practicing?? No.. Strong beliefs? No.. Any belief? Yea, but sketchy.. Lots of doubt? Oh yea! So I believe to "celebrate" Easter Sunday would not be a truthful statement. Easter Sunday would be (for me) to get my family together for one day, for a nice meal, good conversation, laughs, maybe some family gaming, and of course an egg hunt for the grandson. I guess an excuse (in a sense) to try to get everyone together just for a day... Hey, I'm being honest!

Well this year things turned out a bit different than planned. I agreed with my youngest daughter to have "Easter" on Saturday as she was going to Connecticut to spend Easter with her new man's family on Sunday. Unfortunately my grandson was not invited to go to Connecticut as it was the first time she was meeting the brother and he apparently is quite a partier (any "holiday" is a great excuse to get drunk I guess) and it just wasn't a good time to bring the little one. No problem with me! I was going to keep the little guy here and have some fun. My oldest daughter was scheduled to work all weekend at the hospital (7am-7:30pm) so she wouldn't be around at all unfortunately.

Then plans changed yet again.. I found out my daughters BF was going to Connecticut on Saturday and she was going to drive down on Sunday.. they would have 2 cars there, etc. I knew she wanted to be with him for the weekend (as that's the only time they see each other right now) so I told her to go ... Don't worry about it. It's not a big deal really.. go.. I told her I would take care of the little guy of course and we would have some fun. My grandson's "pepere" (my ex) was coming down on Saturday to eat with us anyway, and he decided to build some fish-box thing (don't ask - I don't know) and to do it with his grandson... they were both VERY excited to spend the time together and the little one was so anxious to build a "fish-house" (whatever that may be!). Seeing it was just me, my fiance, my ex and my grandson, we decided to do up a prime rib (of course mac & cheese and a hot dog for the little one:)) ...

Then, plans changed again... on Friday night, my bf lost it finally. My daughter and her BF were stacking trash on top of the trash can cover (rather than take the trash out).. nothing unusual- there are always dishes in the sink (dishwasher is right there but they can't seem to reach most times).. I guess it's been a long time coming, but my bf had a few drinks that night and he was pissed off. He lost it.. My daughter was in tears... it was just a nasty scene. My bf doesn't say boo, so obviously this was building up, but just not a great time to "lose it" especially when drinking.

So Friday night my daughter "arranged" things so that my grandson was going to Connecticut for the weekend too. He didnt' want to go.. he kept saying he wanted to stay home and make a fish-house with his pepere.. and kept telling me he wanted to stay here with me. Sucked so bad yesterday morning.. :( So she packed him up and he went (after she bribed him with a new "police uniform")... His grandfather showed up with the wood and stuff to build the fish thing, but no grandson.. He was mad and sad at the same time. Almost like my daughter took him to spite us, even though it was MY bf she was mad at - we all had to suffer I guess.

We cooked our prime rib, my oldest daughter got called off from work so was able to come by and eat with us (she was disappointed that her nephew wasn't here also as she bought him some cool new clothes ... he loves getting new clothes! .. and some cool paints and stuff).

So that was my "Easter" with my family.

Still alive... for now

I owe myself time to "blog" and I will.. soon!

The economic situation just took a bite out of the "Hotel"

It was announced to all of us on Tuesday, that everyone, from the owner to the guys/gals that sweep the floors takes a 10% pay cut. I keep thinking... hmm.. when the pay cuts start, that usually means the beginning of the end... Fortunately I've been with this company for 15 years and I don't believe that will happen. They (owners) take pride in this being a family owned company and have been around since 1968 and I don't believe that they would let it shut down, even in the midst of this recession/depression (call it what you want). This is the first "drastic" move taken EVER in their history and it was tough for the big man to announce it - but he is very very grateful that his employees took it the way they (we) did - we understand and are all happy to have a job and will deal with the pay cut as best we can. We'd rather lose some than have none! But I know in the back of all our minds (about 700 or so of us) we still "wonder" .. and in this economy I'm sure you all know what I mean.

Anyway.. I froze my 401K - Heck that will give me back almost 1/2 of what I'm losing each week (and will save the company as they won't have to contribute their 50% of my contribution) -- plus it will stay safe. I haven't lost that much but I would rather not lose anything, so that puppy is being put on hold until further notice.

It's my chance to turn in my SUV early right now (Chevy's "pull-ahead" deal for leases) and I'm not sure what to do. I can wait as I don't have to turn it in.. it's just an incentive.. but I have a $400/month lease payment and I ALWAYS upgrade to a bigger/better vehicle and I can't afford that now. Well, I could but I still have that fear of the company closing (in the back of my mind) -- so then I wouldn't be able to afford a box to drive! So do I get rid of my SUV and get a stupid car that I don't like for a couple hundred bucks a months to save money?? Or wait it out.. Been tossing this one around for a couple days - looking at cars on dealer websites/official websites, etc.. I lease because I can't stand being in the same vehicle for long.. what to do....................

Deep breath!

Well I had the weekend off. Daughter and grandson went to Maine for the weekend and my oldest was working and at her boyfriends... I truly did need this break!! Me and the old man cleaned the house and that left me to do what I wanted and him to relax and take control back of his TV and recliner! hahah

I played HL2DM and Left 4 Dead with my friends - we ordered dinner out last night - I slept late yesterday morning (10am!! that's soooo late for me!) and 8am this morning (still very late for me!) - but obviously, I am tired and my body/brain took advantage of the silence..

I most certainly know that I am not "cured" of my problem here, but I certainly feel better today after the sleep and doing what I want and the QUIET!! Happy to see my house in ship-shape status but I know when they all come home tonite that will be gone.. I need to stop thinking ahead and just enjoy the time I have left this weekend... Me and the old man are going to cook some steaks on the grill for dinner (it's 50 degrees here today!!) and then go and hide before the crew gets home..

Another deep breath... exhale ... better.. (for now)

Burn down the Hotel Morel?

I don't think I've been this miserable in a long long long time.. Everybody wants wants wants, but no one wants to give... I'm at my wits end.. they "need" - I am supposed to fill those needs, and like the dumbass that I am, I have been .. (and they know it) I ask a question... I get my head bit off.. I'm exhausted.. not sleeping good, feeling sick.. can't hear out of my left ear at this point.. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr I might just burn down this house and wish them all luck finding a home... I'll live in a fucking box.. I don't care anymore..

Whew...

I think I'm stressing out... or something.. ugghhh

Where has the time gone... ???

I promised myself to write everyday, but I didn't - Oh well, thank goodness the promise was only to me!!

I'm still running "Grammy's Daycare (Nightcare)" 4 nights a week taking care of my grandson for my daughter... Monday - Thursday. I did get spoiled over the Christmas break as she had 2 weeks off.. I was in heaven! I could go to bed when I wanted to, play games if I wanted to, etc. Now it's back to the old "routine".. Come on MAY!!!! She'll be done college (at night) and I'll be FREEEEEEEEEEE!! hahahah

Obviously both daughters (and grandson) are still living here, but again, both have hit it off with new men in their lives so I'm hoping (that's all I can do) is that they will continue to get along and be happy and move out! I will certainly miss them when they do go (if they do go I should say), and it will kill me to not see my grandson everyday, but it's time... it will be best for all us! I would like to get back to my life and they need to start theirs.. Back when I was young (which included my siblings, and friends) - once you left home, you didn't go back - you had to prove you could handle it.. take care of yourself no matter what. .. and we DID! Went home to visit, that was it.. As we know, kids nowadays have it too easy (as noted in an earlier post) - but we let them - our bad! And I don't mean that ALL of us give it to them easy... but certainly many us do (ME)...

I went for my yearly checkup... all is well except for my left leg. I had a blood clot in the femoral artery in October 2006 - 20 inches long - and they were only able to remove 50% of it so I still suffer from lots of swelling in the calf and foot - so bad that I can't even buy a pair of boots... can't get them on over the ankle swelling.. Regardless, it's been a miserable winter so far as I can't go out and do things I normally would with a pair of sneakers (slip on Skechers for that matter) because that's all I can get on my foot (and without socks - as I can't get that left sneaker on if I have a sock on!) BRRRRRRR!

Also asked my doctor why my calf/shin area was discolouring - reddish/brown (like I have a lot of freckles on my lower leg all of a sudden)- it's due to the blood sitting down in that area too long and iron buildup - he explained that it's like "rusting" ----- sheesh... talk about making me feel OLD!!! I'm rusting!!??????? Damn, I'm not ready to rust!!! Get the damn oil can out Dorothy!

So I continue to limp along.. Already informed the boss that I will be working from home tomorrow as we have another big storm coming that is going to start in the wee hours of the morning (when I'm heading for work) and I'm not going out in that snow with my sneakers (mules -whatever slip-on sneakers are called) ... He understands as he blessed me with his annual presence for 10 minutes today and I actually got to show him the "problem leg". So now he knows what I'm dealing with as he has seen it.. Which I think is a good thing!

Guess that's about it for now.. Grandson is done playing with Play-Doh so it's time to clean up the mess with him, so he can watch a couple episodes of Curious George on PBS, make some dinner, get him in the shower ---- etc etc.. Expecting 8-14" of snow so it will be a busy day around here tomorrow (for some people!)..

A New Year and my life back?

I always wonder what will happen -- what will change (if anything) -- what's going to happen in the world, etc. But one can only wait and see!!! You can listen to predictions, etc, BUT, you need to see what comes of them...

Two things going on in my life that I THINK I can predict. 2 daughters - 25 and 28 years old. They have both hooked up with new men.. nice men - normal men (whatever normal is)... but definitely different men than from their pasts. I'm pretty excited for them, as I think they are excited for themselves (and each other - sisters). I'm thinking that by summer ... they will both be living with their new guys (if not married).. either way, doesn't matter to me - Just want them happy! AND want them to be out on their own (they both have left and come home too many times - it's time to fly the coop damn it! lol)

Me and the old man have put our lives on hold for a few years now .... the pressure is there and it's time for the girls to move on.. We've done what we could for them .. as in: co-signing for loans, helping them make payments on loans (school loans) - as they get paid every other week instead of weekly and the payment hits on an "off" week .. letting them live here for FREE!.. Yes... for FREE. But have they saved any money??? Hell no.. not a nickel... This year will be time for us to get tough with them.. (as hard as it's going to be to do that cuz I'm a sap when it comes to my kids). They will either have to start paying room and board or move out... plain and simple.

We had an electricity bill in the latter part of summer that was over $400!! FOUR HUNDRED DOLLARS!! That is INSANE!!!! Even with the swimming pool and central AC.. INSANE! Spoke to the girls about 30 minute showers.. limit is now 10 mins etc etc.. bill was HALF the next month and continued to go down. 30 minute showers are NOT happening here anymore!!!! You want a 30 minute shower... ??? Go to the Y! lol When it was just the 2 of us here, an $80 light bill was high.. in summer, with pool going and A/C, etc.. ..

Don't get me wrong.. we love the girls and my grandson.. They are part of our world, but it's time for them to start their own worlds... and I guess we'll see what happens over the next few months.

I sure do want my life back though!!! I'm 50 years old and shouldn't be taking care of my kids!!!! But I will say, that when they do go... It's going to leave a big empty hole in my heart....