On November 30th, 1980, my first daughter was born.. it was a great day!!! My mom wanted to come down and spend a week with me but my husband said he wanted to stay home and "care for us" that week... So I didn't want to push my husband away nor upset my mom, so I told my mom to spend the week at my oldest sisters as she hadn't seen her in a while, etc.. and after that week, she could come and spend the week with me and the baby.. She agreed. Let me say, that the hubby was no help as the day we got home from the hospital, there was an empty pizza box on the coffee table and a few empty beer bottles (or cans), dirty dishes in the sink.. To say the least I was not happy to bring our new baby home to a mess.. But he said he would clean up.. But FIRST he went rabbit hunting, so of course I cleaned up.. Oh well.. just turned out to be another day in the 16 years we lasted together..
My mom came during the second week that we were home and it was nice as she wasn't there to take care of the baby, but to help around the house and yes, give me a break to get some sleep. All was well until around 6pm on December 15 1980.. phone rang and it was my dad.. he sharply said "let me speak to your mother".. I asked.. "dad, what's wrong???" -- he replied with "your sister and her husband (I won't say names obviously) and my nephew were hit by a train" ...
I didn't know what to say or do, but had to get my mom to the phone. My mom saw that I was trying not to react and got on the phone only to hear my dad tell her that their oldest daughter and her husband had been killed and that their grandson was taken to the hospital and not sure if he was going to survive. (They .. my sister and husband.. had 2 children .. a girl and boy.. My nephew was 14 at the time and my niece 12)...
I was trying to hold my mom up as she had collapsed, and my husband was helping me.. and I was trying to tell my dad he had to come up to our house.. and we were having a terrible snowstorm.. and he came of course.. he was an hour plus away and I needed him to come.. The news came on and my mom saw the footage of the truck and the tragedy.. etc.. I still didn't know what to do, or say, or even really react... I needed my dad there..
My dad made it up through the storm and of course they stayed with us .. until morning. My neice wasn't with her parents as she didn't want to go shopping with her mom. My sister's schedule that evening was to drop her husband back off at work at he had paperwork to do, drop her son off at CCD class and get a little Christmas shopping done before picking them both back up..
They had just started a new commuter train running through Manchester NH and even though there was a set of tracks that they (and everyone else in their neighborhood) had to cross on a daily basis (more than twice a day for most) everyone basically knew the schedule (without the commuter train) - and there were no crossing lights or gates or anything.. one slowed down, looked both ways (like a *yield*) and commenced.. But that night the commuter train came through... going approximately 60-70mph, in a residential neighborhood (speed limit is like 30 in a residential for trains), never blew the whistle.. and they never saw it coming.. Apparently passengers were quite upset at the speed they were going and the fact that not one passenger heard the whistle blow before the crossing (or any other crossing for that matter)..
My neice heard the crash, as did many of the neighbors (and it was a very great neighborhood.. all friends, etc).. so everyone headed towards the noise. When they got there, they only saw her husband and son in the truck (most didn't know my sister was there) until my neice got there.. Her dad died on site, and her brother was rushed to the hospital.. But where was my sister? A neighbor was walking up the tracks to the accident and found her... about 150' from the wreck where she was thrown. The only way my dad could identify her was from her jewelry (a couple of special rings that were still "intact") ..
So that was 10 days before Christmas 28 years ago today. I'll never be over it, but I can deal with this whole scenario a lot better now. My nephew is still alive, but a parapalegic and has never attempted to speak since the accident.. even after he came out of the coma (which was LONG.. and I can't remember how long now) - he had speech therapy, etc and can say words, but he has never and will never say anything about that night... My neice has a couple kids with 2 different husbands and is actually finalizing her divorce today from her husband of a mere 7 years..
And life goes on................ I hope
My mom came during the second week that we were home and it was nice as she wasn't there to take care of the baby, but to help around the house and yes, give me a break to get some sleep. All was well until around 6pm on December 15 1980.. phone rang and it was my dad.. he sharply said "let me speak to your mother".. I asked.. "dad, what's wrong???" -- he replied with "your sister and her husband (I won't say names obviously) and my nephew were hit by a train" ...
I didn't know what to say or do, but had to get my mom to the phone. My mom saw that I was trying not to react and got on the phone only to hear my dad tell her that their oldest daughter and her husband had been killed and that their grandson was taken to the hospital and not sure if he was going to survive. (They .. my sister and husband.. had 2 children .. a girl and boy.. My nephew was 14 at the time and my niece 12)...
I was trying to hold my mom up as she had collapsed, and my husband was helping me.. and I was trying to tell my dad he had to come up to our house.. and we were having a terrible snowstorm.. and he came of course.. he was an hour plus away and I needed him to come.. The news came on and my mom saw the footage of the truck and the tragedy.. etc.. I still didn't know what to do, or say, or even really react... I needed my dad there..
My dad made it up through the storm and of course they stayed with us .. until morning. My neice wasn't with her parents as she didn't want to go shopping with her mom. My sister's schedule that evening was to drop her husband back off at work at he had paperwork to do, drop her son off at CCD class and get a little Christmas shopping done before picking them both back up..
They had just started a new commuter train running through Manchester NH and even though there was a set of tracks that they (and everyone else in their neighborhood) had to cross on a daily basis (more than twice a day for most) everyone basically knew the schedule (without the commuter train) - and there were no crossing lights or gates or anything.. one slowed down, looked both ways (like a *yield*) and commenced.. But that night the commuter train came through... going approximately 60-70mph, in a residential neighborhood (speed limit is like 30 in a residential for trains), never blew the whistle.. and they never saw it coming.. Apparently passengers were quite upset at the speed they were going and the fact that not one passenger heard the whistle blow before the crossing (or any other crossing for that matter)..
My neice heard the crash, as did many of the neighbors (and it was a very great neighborhood.. all friends, etc).. so everyone headed towards the noise. When they got there, they only saw her husband and son in the truck (most didn't know my sister was there) until my neice got there.. Her dad died on site, and her brother was rushed to the hospital.. But where was my sister? A neighbor was walking up the tracks to the accident and found her... about 150' from the wreck where she was thrown. The only way my dad could identify her was from her jewelry (a couple of special rings that were still "intact") ..
So that was 10 days before Christmas 28 years ago today. I'll never be over it, but I can deal with this whole scenario a lot better now. My nephew is still alive, but a parapalegic and has never attempted to speak since the accident.. even after he came out of the coma (which was LONG.. and I can't remember how long now) - he had speech therapy, etc and can say words, but he has never and will never say anything about that night... My neice has a couple kids with 2 different husbands and is actually finalizing her divorce today from her husband of a mere 7 years..
And life goes on................ I hope
2 comments:
Ice that is such a sad story. I often think about getting 'that' call and it isn't pleasant to think about. I'm sure it is much harder to experience. Frankly, with my mental state at times, I don't know if I could handle such a situation, but I guess I would somehow.
When you wrote 'life goes on..I hope,' that just sounds so forlorn. You're not trying to tell us something?
One always has to wonder Alvis... IF life will go on.. we all try hard after all the bad things come down crashing upon us.. and usually we make it through it all.. but one has to wonder... will we make it??
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